Saturday, November 8, 2008

What is missing is me.

I spend a lot of time thinking about the spirit and soul in relation to life. It is hard for me to not include others in these thoughts, for no journey on the planet would be complete without the souls I have incarnated with. It is hard to not think about certain people in relation to myself on the planet. It is hard not to love these people very deeply. For life is about love, love is about life. We are here on the planet to love and experience, experience and love but we have lost sight of the love part of life. Most of us are just here for the experience and give no thought to loving people for the sake of loving them. Most people love others in order to achieve something from them, whether its sex, or companionship or money or presents or validation. Most people do not love just for the sake of loving someone. But that my friends is how we are suppose to love. When you love someone just because you love them, you love them unconditionally. We are suppose to love ourselves this way, others this way and the world this way. I love Nico this way because I love myself this way. I love her because I love her. Love has no proper explanation, it is a feeling inside. it is how someone makes you feel when you think about them, it is all good and it is all light. But what is missing is me. There may be us on some level of life, but what is missing is me.

I am stuck between the physical realm and the spiritual realm. My love for Nico takes me into the spiritual realm and reminds me that this love is the love that makes up everything in the universe. This love is how I feel about myself and how I feel about the world. Digging through the dirt in my heart after being hurt over many times in many different ways has led to an endless treasure trove of love inside of me. She is a huge part of that love. That is the light of my truth but what is missing is me.

Who am I really? How can I truly know who I am without a mirror to look into everyday to see the wonderment that is my soul through the mirror of your eyes. What is missing is me.

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