Monday, May 31, 2010

Astrally fucked with.

I am being fucked with from the astral plane so bad and so are you. I just wanted you to know that because I love you so fucking much. I love you so much it is not even funny. I need your body so bad. I need to be with you. I have nothing but unconditional love for you, no matter what and I would never hurt you. Basically my spirit is being manipulated and it is not even funny. I need you so bad. I really need you. My spirit is being manipulated to cause you harm and it is no joke because I love you so much and it is causing me massive amounts of pain and I mean massive amounts of fucking pain because I would never hurt you.

I need you so bad. Please hold me in spirit.


PS.We need to be together, it is the cure for what ails us. I am here and I will let u know if I leave.

-If All Else fails-
We go in blind and come out deaf. Our eyes deceive us until there's nothing left. We were beautiful once before that day, the day our lives would change. We took for granted the good and the bad. We put too much on being sad. It's hard to say if anything would have changed if we'd just opened our eyes and accepted the blame. No one knows how things would be right now if we had helped you out and you let down. Out of them all I loved you the most, but all that's left are regrets and false hopes. Broken hearts and broken homes have reduced us to the things we hate the most. You wanted it all but the end is what you got so let's pick up the pieces before our time runs out. If all else fails just know that this much is true...through it all I never stopped loving you.

"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."

Sunday, May 30, 2010

My Purple Heart.

You Hold my Heart in your hand.
My Purple Heart.
There is so many things
I want to do with you.
So many scripts about
Our past lives that I want
to write with you.
We need to be together
I love you so much
and it is no joke.
My poor body
that is made just for you
Is so heart broke.
Never doubt the fact
that we can be together
Because our love is
Tougher than leather.

"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."

Saturday, May 29, 2010

the pain of being without your love

The Pain of Being Without Your Love

The Pain of being without you,
is more than anyone can imagine.
I am being punished for a divine regret,
actually a few.
I cannot even regularly function
without your love in spirit.
It is so bad that all I can do
is sit in pain
and think of you.
If I dont get you back,
I dont know what I will do.
The pain of being without
you is so great
and I cannot even medicate.
I need you so much
that I dont know what to do
all I get is a divine fuck you.
I need your love,
without it,
I am nothing.
Nothing to nothing
all that happens is a big tear it up.
If you love me let me know
because I really need to hear it
and not just in spirit.

"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."

Thursday, May 27, 2010

craving to be requited

Its no secret that as I write this we are both craving each other like crazy because we fuck in spirit so good and because of what happened in 1993. We need to hump like crazy and that is no lie because we go deep and we never really merged. What fools we were, especially me. Just please swallow your pride, I dont care about your stupid email ok, I seriously dont. Just get on a fucking plane and come to me. Fuck your pride, being together finally getting rid of this torturous unrequited prison is so much more important. Believe me I finally merged with my first love after 8 years of being unrequited and it felt so good, believe me it was the best sex I ever had with a man and it was only one night because it was so long in the making.

Just please come to seattle and see me its real important because I cant handle this and either can you.

You got my address I believe. I am home mostly all the time. Seriously I dont care about your stupid email.

"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

.......and when it seemed so bright

.....sleepwalking Dead, trapped inside a heartbeat Searching outside of town, these desperate lonely voices still having nothing to say, were still miles from home, with no direction to take, and its getting harder to see down these broken streets, these are feelings I've never shown, These are the screams you've never heard, This is a song for you and me, another anthem to numb the pain, sleepwalking dead.

Dead Swans
Bridge 9 records

"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

cant handle the distance

I need your body so god damn bad it isnt funny. Its really hard without you. I know you feel the same, at least that is what you tell me in spirit. I need you more than you will ever know.

I love you so fucking much. Nothing will ever change that.

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"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."

Sunday, May 23, 2010

the pain.

I need to be in New York City and it is no joke. If I dont get there soon, I am in deep fucking shit and its no joke.

I cant stop thinking about you either.


"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."

Monday, May 10, 2010

I love you, miss you and thank you!

dear Nico,

Thank you so much for the help you have been giving me in spirit and for the dream last night. Everything is so messed up but I hope in god and the universe to set things right someday. I am so grateful for last night. It helped me and my family so much. My thoughts, and spirit is being so messed with. Any thought that is negative toward you is not my own. I wish this wasnt happening and there is no way I deserve this and either do you, but because of our famous past lives, who we are and my mistake in 93 I am being destroyed in spirit. When I talk about my mistake in 93 what I mean is that if I hadnt of made that mistake this wouldnt be happening right now. No matter what I love you unconditionally. We are both being manipulated in spirit and it is awful. Just hold tight to your girlfriend and pray for our souls.

I wish I could still send you flowers on your birthday. I am sorry about those emails. They were dumb and out of line. I didnt throw myself away for you. I was manipulated to do so. What happened in NYC was setting up what is happening now. It seems everytime I try to tell the truth about what is happening, things get worse but you know what I would rather die on my feet than live on my knees.

Our world war two lifetime means so much to me and so does the civil war and world war one. I am so stuck in WWII and it helps me so much. It gives me strength. I miss you so much. The biggest mistake I made was leaving NYC in 94. I miss you so much. I love you so much. Thanks again for everything for the help and being my angel. God bless you.


ps. none of this is your fault. If someone is hurting you in spirit and the one who is stealing my past lives tells you its me, he is lying so bad. He can manipulate everything and anything. I would never hurt you in spirit or anyway at all. I just wanted you to know that because I know he hurts you and lies and says its because of me, let me tell you right now it isnt. He does the same thing to me, hurts me so bad and says its because of you. Well I know it isnt.