TIME TO TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT ISRAEL ...
... WITHOUT FEAR OF THE MIND POLICE
The Thought Censors don't like it? Tough
By David Icke
January 10th 2009
Hello all ...
So yet again the people of the virtual-concentration camp, known officially as 'Gaza', are being bombarded from the sky and from the ground by the bully-boys of Tel Aviv.
State-of-the art Israeli jets and tanks, paid for by the United States, strike civilian targets in this tragic, poverty-stricken wasteland which acts as a holding camp for the human beings the Israeli government would rather be dead.
The world watches as a nation of people, the Palestinians, is systematically crushed and destroyed by the tyrants who call the shots in Israel on behalf of that country's real power structure - the House of Rothschild.
And, taxpayers of America (and elsewhere), you are paying for this calculated slaughter.
The Palestinian 'territories' of Gaza and the West Bank
American aid to Israel accounts for something like a third of all US overseas aid when Israel is home to just .001 per cent of the global population and has one of the highest incomes per head in the world. This is without all the 'private' donations from US corporations and individuals which are tax-deductible even when given to the Israeli military, unlike any other foreign power.
According to 2007 figures, the United States government gave more than $6.8 million to wealthy Israel every day while to the desperate and devastated Palestinians of the Gaza Strip and the West Bank they gave just $300,000.
US military 'aid' to Israel increased by more than a quarter to an average $3 billion a year in 2007 - a figure guaranteed for ten years. This and other support makes Israel the biggest recipient of United States foreign military funding since the Second World War.
The United States is also Israel's biggest supplier of fighter planes, weapons and other military technology. As a result, Israel has the world's largest F-16 fleet outside the US Air Force. In their book, The Israel Lobby and U.S. Foreign Policy, John J. Mearsheimer and Stephen M. Walt write:
'Since the October War in 1973, Washington has provided Israel with a level of support dwarfing the amounts provided to any other state. It has been the largest annual recipient of direct U.S. economic and military assistance since 1976 and the largest total recipient since World War ll. Total direct U.S. aid to Israel amounts to well over $140 billion in 2003 dollars.
Israel receives about $3 billion in direct foreign assistance each year, which is roughly one-fifth of America's entire foreign aid budget. In per capita terms, the United States gives each Israeli a direct subsidy worth about $500 per year. This largesse is especially striking when one realizes that Israel is now a wealthy industrial state with a per capita income roughly equal to South Korea or Spain.'
Why do they do this? Because the House of Rothschild controls Israel and the House of Rothschild controls the political system of the United States. The network that links the two is called 'Zionism', a Rothschild creation - just like Israel itself.
The might of this Zionist cabal spanning Israel, the United States, Europe and beyond is yet again, like the playground bully that it is, attacking the little kid in the callipers - the people of Gaza.
At the time of writing the death toll is more than 800 Palestinian men, women and children with thousands injured, many disabled for life. They are bombing the unarmed innocent knowing there will be no credible response - the way all bullies operate. Oh, brave men of Israel; oh how Yahweh would be so proud:
'When the LORD your God hands these nations over to you and you conquer them, you must completely destroy them. Make no treaties with them and show them no mercy.'
Deuteronomy 7:1-4
What we are seeing in Gaza, and have seen so many times, both there and in the Lebanon, is merciless Old Testament slaughter: cold, calculated, heartless slaughter.
'So they sent twelve thousand warriors to Jabesh-gilead with orders to kill everyone there, including women and children. "This is what you are to do," they said. "Completely destroy all the males and every woman who is not a virgin".'
Judges 21:10-24
'Then I heard the LORD say to the other men, "Follow him through the city and kill everyone whose forehead is not marked. Show no mercy; have no pity! Kill them all - old and young, girls and women and little children. But do not touch anyone with the mark. Begin your task right here at the Temple".'
Ezekiel 9:5-7
'So they began by killing the seventy leaders. "Defile the Temple!" the LORD commanded. "Fill its courtyards with the bodies of those you kill! Go!" So they went throughout the city and did as they were told.'
Ezekiel 9:5-7
The parallels are endless between the bloodthirsty 'God' of the Old Testament and the actions of the heartless, soulless, Artificial Intelligence that controls Israel, most notably the biological robots of the House of Rothschild who thus have no soul, no empathy, no more mercy for the consequences of their actions than a desktop computer.
Imagine if Iran or anyone else outside Israel and the United States (both Rothschild assets) was doing what the Israeli military is doing in Gaza. There would be global condemnation, not least from Israel and the United States, resolutions passed in the UN Security Council fiercely attacking the country involved and talk of the need for sanctions or military intervention to 'save the innocent'.
But when Israel does it we have vacuous calls for a truce, an end to the violence while 'understanding Israel's position', and, in terms of soon-to-be President 'Change' Obama, silence. It's all a fraction of what others would face because Israel is a wholly-owned asset of the Rothschilds and so is not subject to the same rules as anyone else. As former Israeli Prime Minister, Ariel Sharon, said:
'Israel may have the right to put others on trial, but certainly no one has the right to put the Jewish people and the State of Israel on trial.'
And Prime Minister Golda Meir betrayed the same Zionist arrogance:
'This country exists as the fulfilment of a promise made by God Himself. It would be ridiculous to ask it to account for its legitimacy.'
Ah, it's all in the Old Testament? Gotcha, right, well do as you like then.
The 'Jewish homeland' was from the start a Rothschild fiefdom orchestrated through the global secret society network of interbreeding families known as the Illuminati.
During the Israeli military attacks on the Lebanon in 2006, the Israeli writer, Barry Chamish, told of a meeting with Evelyn Rothschild's grandson, who abandoned the family to be a Mormon (so actually he didn't, even if he thought he did).
Chamish said he learned that just seven families were enjoying the 'fruits of the war' with the Lebanon. The grandson had said of the Rothschilds: 'They created Israel as their personal toy. It makes them richer and gives them more control. It's not going to be destroyed.'
The Rothschilds funded the early European settlers in Israel, manipulated events in Germany that led to the horrific treatment of Jewish people and others, and then used that as the excuse to reach their long-term goal - a Rothschild-Illuminati stronghold in Palestine using the Jewish population as fodder to be used and abused as necessary.
They called their plan 'Zionism'. This term is often used as a synonym for Jewish people when it is actually a political movement devised and promoted through the House of Rothschild and opposed by many Jews.
Poster for the Irgun terrorist group
The Israeli bully-boys spend most of their time condemning the terrorism of others and yet their very State was created through terrorism of the most grotesque kind via groups like Irgun, Haganah and the Stern Gang, which bombed and terrorised Israel into being and from which came the Israel Defence Forces, the IDF, which is bombing Gaza today.
Among the leading lights in these and other terrorist groups were Menachem Begin, Yitzhak Shamir and Ariel Sharon, butchers who became Israeli Prime Ministers and had the nerve to condemn Arab terrorism. And to this day the butchery goes on with the goal of destroying the Palestinian people.
After the Rothschild-controlled Zionist terrorists had bombed the State of Israel into existence in 1948, an estimated 800,000 Palestinians were made refugees and fled what had been their own country. Their descendents are said to number some four million.
And the world simply looked on - just as it does to this day - because Israel is a law unto itself and so terms like justice, fairness, decency and mercy do not apply.
Palestinian families fleeing the newly-imposed Israel after their country was occupied by Zionist terrorism in 1948.
The idea was always to destroy the Palestinian people step-by-step long before Israel was even created. The Balfour Declaration of 1917, in which the Rothschild-controlled British government supported the establishment of a 'Jewish' homeland in Palestine, said that 'nothing shall be done which may prejudice the civil and religious rights of the existing non-Jewish communities in Palestine'.
But the Rothschild sidekick Chaim Weizmann would later say: 'With regard to the Arab question - the British told us that there are several hundred thousand Negroes there but this is a matter of no consequence'. Nor have they been ever since and the goal of destroying them is closer today than ever before.
The first Prime Minister of Israel, yet another terrorist called David Ben-Gurion, made no secret of this fact within his inner circle. Former Israel Prime Minister, Yitzhak Rabin, said in an uncensored version of his memoirs, published in the New York Times on 23 October 23rd, 1979:
'We walked outside, Ben-Gurion accompanying us. Allon repeated his question - What is to be done with the Palestinian population?' Ben-Gurion waved his hand in a gesture which said "Drive them out!"'
The current bombing campaign against the Gaza Palestinians is just the latest step to that end. They have forced Palestinians into a Gaza Strip that is little more than a massive concentration camp in which they control all that goes in and out, people or supplies of food, medicines and other essentials.
When the Israelis close the border posts, that's it, the Palestinians are trapped and at the mercy of the soulless and heartless that control the Tel Aviv government and military under Rothschild direction.
One writer recently described conditions in Gaza:
' ... Israel nails shut the coffin that is Gaza under a siege that has lasted nearly three years, steadily intensifying so that malnutrition rates rival those of sub-Saharan Africa, sewage runs raw in the streets and pollutes the ocean, homes are still being bulldozed to super-add collective punishment upon collective punishment; men, women and children are still being sniped at and killed; children are deafened by continuing sonic booms, the vast majority of them suffer from post-traumatic stress syndrome, and many of that majority have no ambition other than becoming "martyrs" ...'
And it's a whole lot worse now.
How can anyone inflict such a lack of mercy on an entire people? The question can only be answered when we understand that Zionist extremists really do believe they are God's Chosen People and that therefore the Palestinians are little more than cattle.
The Israel Prime Minister and terrorist, Menachem Begin, described the Palestinians in a speech to the Israeli parliament as 'beasts walking on two legs'. Another Prime Minister and terrorist, Yitzhak Shamir, told Jewish settlers in 1988 that the Palestinians 'would be crushed like grasshoppers ... heads smashed against the boulders and walls.'
Prime Minister and terrorist, Ariel Sharon, then Israeli Foreign Minister, confirmed in 1998 what the plan really was for the Palestinians:
'It is the duty of Israeli leaders to explain to public opinion, clearly and courageously, a certain number of facts that are forgotten with time. The first of these is that there is no Zionism, colonialisation, or Jewish State without the eviction of the Arabs and the expropriation of their lands.'
The plan is to kill or drive out the Palestinian people using poverty, hunger and war and so allow the Zionists to expand into 'Greater Israel'. That plan is now well advanced.
In early 2008, the United Nations' leading humanitarian affairs official said he was 'shocked' by the 'grim and miserable' conditions in Gaza. Undersecretary General John Holmes blamed this on Israel closing the border crossings and so limiting the supply of food and other materials - just as they are doing today.
He said: 'All this makes for a grim human and humanitarian situation here in Gaza, which means that people are not able to live with the basic dignity to which they are entitled'.
But they are just 'beasts walking on two legs', right?
Richard Falk, the UN Human Rights Council Special Rapporteur on the occupied territories, has also condemned Israel for its actions in Gaza. He is Jewish and therefore much more dangerous to the Israel government because he can't be dismissed as the old favourite 'anti-Semitic'. Or maybe he is a 'self-hater', the tag given by these sick people to those Jews who speak out against Israel.
Falk's punishment for daring to criticise the Promised Land as a UN official was to be held for 20 hours and then denied entry to the country and so he is prevented from doing his job of reporting on conditions for the Palestinian people during the current air and ground attacks.
His entry was denied in mid-December - perfect timing not to be there for the latest bombing that they knew was coming. Click here for an interview with Richard Falk ...
The Bush administration for the last eight years has been dominated by the Neo-conservative, or 'Neocon', network which is, itself, dominated by US/Israeli duel citizens and/or Zionists like Paul Wolfowitz, Richard Pearle, Dov Zackheim, William Kristol, Robert Kagan, Elliot Abrams, Douglas Feith, John Bolton, Robert B Zoellick, Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld and others. The neo-con godfather is the late Leo Strauss, a German-born Jewish 'philosopher', who believed that people must be governed by a 'pious elite'.
But surely those days of Zionist dominance are over because 'Mr. Change' is coming to 'power' now. Er, if only. Barack Obama has packed his 'new' administration with Zionists like Rahm Emanuel, his White House Chief of Staff.
Emanuel's father, Benjamin, is a Zionist extremist who was a member of the Irgun terrorist group in Palestine that I mentioned earlier and we can clearly expect the Obama administration to be balanced and fair on its Israel/Palestinian policy. No wonder Obama has kept quiet on the Israeli bombing of Gaza.
Obama speaks out on Gaza crisis: 'Hey, I got nothin' to say, I got the chance of a par here ... ask my Chief of Staff, he's a rabid Zionist and his dad helped bomb Israel into existence. He'll know what's goin' on.'
The Obama government is going to be slavishly pro-Israel because he needed the sanction of the truly massive Zionist lobby in the United States to secure the presidency. His vice-president, Joe Biden, is a long-time bag-carrier for Israel. He said on Israeli television: 'I am a Zionist - you don't have to be a Jew to be a Zionist'. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is another Israel puppetess who pledged to 'obliterate' Iran if it launched a nuclear attack on God's chosen country.
Would she say she would obliterate Israel if it launched a nuclear attack on Iran? No way.
The Palestinians have never had a chance because the table is weighted, the game is rigged and it always has been. At the time of the First World War, the Rothschild-controlled British government told the Palestine Arabs that if they fought the Ottoman Turks and forced them to leave Palestine and other lands they would be rewarded with an independent Palestine.
The Palestinian Arabs agreed and with support from the British through Lieutenant Colonel Thomas Edward Lawrence - 'Lawrence of Arabia' - the Ottoman Empire was defeated. But their reward was not independence. It was first rule by a British 'Mandate' and then occupation by Zionist Israel.
The Arabs were lied to, as Lawrence later admitted, and they have been lied to ever since. All these 'road maps' and 'peace processes' are always designed to lead nowhere. They are just holding positions to maintain the status quo until the Palestinians are basically no more.
The Israelis always say they are killing people in 'retaliation' for attacks by the Palestinian group, Hamas, which officially controls the Gaza 'authority', although control is hardly the word with Israel deciding what and who goes in and out.
Hamas operatives are firing seriously low-tech rockets that have so far killed four people. Terrible, yes, and it should not be happening. I have no brief for Hamas, which is another tyranny in its own way, but ask yourself this: What would you do if you were faced with the situation the Palestinians are in after sixty years of oppression and persecution while the world does nothing?
If you remove the injustice, you remove the motivation for a violent response to that injustice. Put people in a position where they either accept their pathetic plight or open fire and some are bound to choose the latter.
But instead of tackling the root cause, injustice, Israel responds with a state-of-the-art bombardment that kills more than 800 and injures thousands in a few days, at least 90% of which are men, women and children who have nothing whatsoever to do with the rocket attacks. In 2007, 25 Palestinians were killed for every Israeli. That's more than just 'protecting yourself'.
As Jewish UN representative, Richard Falk, said in the last two weeks even before the ground offensive:
'The Israeli airstrikes on the Gaza Strip represent severe and massive violations of international humanitarian law as defined in the Geneva Conventions, both in regard to the obligations of an Occupying Power and in the requirements of the laws of war ...
Those violations include:
* Collective punishment: The entire 1.5 million people who live in the crowded Gaza Strip are being punished for the actions of a few militants.
* Targeting civilians: The airstrikes were aimed at civilian areas in one of the most crowded stretches of land in the world, certainly the most densely populated area of the Middle East.
* Disproportionate military response: The airstrikes have not only destroyed every police and security office of Gaza's elected government, but have killed and injured hundreds of civilians; at least one strike reportedly hit groups of students attempting to find transportation home from the university.'
This savagery towards Palestinians has been going on since the Zionist terror groups began their campaign of violence to secure the State of Israel and the scale of this ongoing evil has often been suppressed by the fear of being called 'anti-Semitic'.
The Rothschild dynasty has created a highly-funded network of 'anti-hate' groups, like the Anti-Defamation League (ADL) and so many others, to label as 'anti-Semitic' or 'racist' anyone who dares to expose or condemn Israel or its networks of manipulation within the United States and elsewhere.
Politicians (though all but are a few are terrified or rewarded into silence), university professors, people like me, and anyone with any kind of public stage, are immediately condemned by the ADL and smeared as 'racist' with support from the Robot Radicals of the Robot 'Left' if they expose Israel or anyone who happens to be Jewish.
The irony of those claiming to be the chosen people and above all others accusing anyone else of racism boggles the bloody mind.
Jewish people who challenge the tyranny, like the superb Norman Finkelstein, are dubbed 'self-haters' and often lose their jobs and livelihoods as a result. The Rothschild 'anti-hate' groups put any Big Brother to shame.
But we can't - and MUST NOT - stay silent on the plight of the Palestinians because we fear the consequences for ourselves. What are we, mice??
This is not about racism; it is about fascism and the daily onslaught against a helpless and tragic people. I don't give a shit what the ADL thinks about what I say, nor those on the 'Left' who parrot its propaganda like the juveniles that they are.
It needs saying and therefore someone needs to say it.
And, by the way, those that are running the Zionist agenda, which is part of much bigger global agenda in league with the Illuminati families, don't give a damn for Jewish people in general. They, too, are just an expendable irrelevance to the greater goal.
As the first Israeli Prime Minister, the terrorist, David Ben-Gurion, said:
'If I knew that it was possible to save all the children of Germany by transporting them to England, and only half by transferring them to the Land of Israel, I would choose the latter, for before us lies not only the numbers of these children but the historical reckoning of the people of Israel.'
What kind of sick mind does it take to say that? The kind that has run Israel since 1948 would appear to be the answer.
We need to drop the ludicrous, childish, labels of Jew and Gentile and Muslim and all this illusory crap and come together in the name of peace and justice for all. There is not a Jewish injustice or a Palestinian injustice, there is simply injustice.
Justice for one and no justice for another is 'justice' for no-one. For justice has no meaning unless it applies to all, and it will never apply to the Palestinians while the world stays silent and looks the other way
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Stop the Slaughter in Gaza
Stop the Slaughter in Gaza
Current mood: awake
Category: Life
Stop the Slaughter in Gaza
Mass struggle is the only way out
Israel's government's rule has been a chain of scandals and failures,
most recently the impact of the world capitalist crisis.
Now they are trying to save themselves from defeat in February's
elections by means of a wholesale slaughter of Palestinians in this
long planned attack.
Abu Abas, Mubarak and the Arab League leaders condemn the massacre.
But they were complicit in Israel's starving of the Gaza's 1.5 million
inhabitants by Israel's 16-month siege. These regimes willingly carry
out the dictates of imperialism. Mubarak's authoritarian regime in
Egypt collaborated in the imprisonment of the Palestinians by
preventing free movement of goods and people on Egypt's border with
Gaza. Mubarak even met Israel's foreign minister Livni on the day
before Israel's attack.
Bush, and Obama, have refused to force Israel to immediately halt the
carnage. Bush used similar brutality in the US occupation of Iraq and
Afghanistan. While Miliband makes feeble calls for a cease-fire, the
White House does not criticise the massive Israeli onslaught and
blames Hamas for provoking these attacks on Gaza. Bush supports the
Israeli/Egyptian blockade of Gaza while condemning the consequent
Hamas rocket fire into Israeli cities.
Hamas' rocket fire cannot defeat the Israeli state's oppression of
Palestinians. The Israeli ruling class do not care about the working
class inhabitants of the towns bordering Gaza, but uses their plight
to justify the war. The Hamas leadership use the rockets as a means to
hide their lack of any strategy to liberate the Palestinian masses
from the Israeli siege. The Israeli government does not defend the
real interests of ordinary Israelis, rather it exploits their fears.
Every gain made in the history of Palestinian struggle has been the
result of active mobilisation of the masses. Tragically for
Palestinians neither Hamas, nor Fatah, nor the Arab regimes, have a
strategy to defend the masses and stop the Israeli state's slaughter.
* For an immediate end to Israeli attacks. For an immediate end to
the siege of Palestine.
* For escalation of demonstrations and protests against the war, in
the Middle East and internationally.
* No trust in the world powers or the United Nations. The Palestinian
masses must have trust in their own struggle and appeal for support from the
working masses internationally, especially in the Middle East,
including Israel.
* Organize the masses in self-defence. Mass action by Palestinians and
Egyptians to break the siege that imprisons Gaza.
* For united struggles by the workers and poor to overthrow all the
capitalist regimes in the Arab states and in Israel. For workers'
governments across the Middle East which can end the cycle of violence
by resolving the contentious issues in the interests of working people
and start to create a society run for the needs of ordinary people.
* For a Socialist Palestine and a Socialist Israel as part of a
Socialist Federation of Middle Eastern States.
A Statement from the Committee for a Workers' International (CWI).
(Socialist Alternative stands in political solidarity with the CWI.)
Posted Dec. 29, 2008
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"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
Monday, December 22, 2008
Bored In Connecticut.
Well I am at my parents house in CT. The best part about it is spending time with my niece who is absolutely awesome. She is really the cutest, most artistic, creative, intelligent kid I have ever seen. If she was my kid I could understand, but she's my sister's kid. My sister is very conservative, but also very loving. She is really adorable and has all the best facial features of my sister. She truly is a little angel. She spends tons of time at my parents house. We actually really miss her when she leaves. She is only a year and 5 months but she seems a lot older than that.
I am pretty bored here though. There is not much to do at all. They live in the middle of the CT woods with no where to walk too with any signs of life. Plus we had a blizzard and it is mad cold out. It sucks not being able to see any of my friends in New Haven because I don't have a car to use. But while I am out here I am going to go to New York City, but not until the weekend.
I am really extremely sad, bored and lonely..but what the fuck else is new. I got to get a new life, I am sick of not having my wife. When I die, bury me upside down in Thomaston, CT so the whole wide world can kiss my ass. I got to get the fuck out of this body. Nothing and nowhere makes me happy without my soul twin in this life.
FUCK!
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
I am pretty bored here though. There is not much to do at all. They live in the middle of the CT woods with no where to walk too with any signs of life. Plus we had a blizzard and it is mad cold out. It sucks not being able to see any of my friends in New Haven because I don't have a car to use. But while I am out here I am going to go to New York City, but not until the weekend.
I am really extremely sad, bored and lonely..but what the fuck else is new. I got to get a new life, I am sick of not having my wife. When I die, bury me upside down in Thomaston, CT so the whole wide world can kiss my ass. I got to get the fuck out of this body. Nothing and nowhere makes me happy without my soul twin in this life.
FUCK!
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
Saturday, December 20, 2008
The Pain I Deserve.
It is ok that your going to cause me more pain because I deserve it. Want to know why I deserve it? In 1993 (with you) I did not play my part correctly. I did not play the part of the guy, like I was suppose to and like I wanted to. So many times in those critical first few months I wanted to hold you in my arms, make out with you, bring you home to my bed and tell you how much I loved you. But everyday, every hour with you I was so fucking afraid of myself, the god within and my sexuality. I know why you left me and it wasn't the lie you told yourself, it was my inability to have sex with you, my in ability to tell you how I feel and my inability to give you the love and affection that you needed. This is why I lost you.
Those silent moments, those times when you thought I was angry because I was silent and introspective....it was those times that I wanted to tell you how I felt, wanted to take you in my arms, but in my head I was so afraid. All I could do was argue with myself to try and get myself to play my part. Every moment with you all I was thinking about was how much I wanted to tell you I loved you and how much I wanted to have sex with you. But I was a pussy and I was fucked up and I did not accept my sexuality and I was deeply confused over not being born in a male body and my extreme hormonal balance made it all so much worse.
I was never angry or unhappy when I was with you. NEVER. All I thought about was how much I loved you but because I did not act on these thoughts...I lost you. I fucked up our lifetime, I fucked my own life up for many years (and counting) because of the pain I now have to live with because of my serious mistake with you. All of our past lives make it worse because I was the male and always played my part. I understand why your soul would be confused and extremely hurt by my inaction. I am sorry. I suffer greatly because of this. I still love you just like I did all those years ago when I first met you. I deserve the pain you cause me and are going to cause me. I am sorry.
With a heavy heart,
kimpunkrock
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
Those silent moments, those times when you thought I was angry because I was silent and introspective....it was those times that I wanted to tell you how I felt, wanted to take you in my arms, but in my head I was so afraid. All I could do was argue with myself to try and get myself to play my part. Every moment with you all I was thinking about was how much I wanted to tell you I loved you and how much I wanted to have sex with you. But I was a pussy and I was fucked up and I did not accept my sexuality and I was deeply confused over not being born in a male body and my extreme hormonal balance made it all so much worse.
I was never angry or unhappy when I was with you. NEVER. All I thought about was how much I loved you but because I did not act on these thoughts...I lost you. I fucked up our lifetime, I fucked my own life up for many years (and counting) because of the pain I now have to live with because of my serious mistake with you. All of our past lives make it worse because I was the male and always played my part. I understand why your soul would be confused and extremely hurt by my inaction. I am sorry. I suffer greatly because of this. I still love you just like I did all those years ago when I first met you. I deserve the pain you cause me and are going to cause me. I am sorry.
With a heavy heart,
kimpunkrock
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
Holy White Christmas Batman!
Damn...I am stuck in the middle of a blizzard here in Albany NY. I had to stay in a hotel because my family was unable to make the trip to Albany from CT to pick me up because of the blizzard. The motel is really nice and I have a jacuzzi room...boy could I get use to that. But since I am poor, it will probably be a long time before I get to use another one. I am taking full advantage of it while I am here.
The train ride was stressful and cold. We arrived in Chicago 8 hours late and I had no lay over, which meant that I was on the train for 4 days without a break. I was pretty crabby by the time I got to Albany and the blizzard I walked into did not make it any better. Hell its 7 am the next morning and it is still snowing outside. I wonder if I will have to stay here again tonight (Saturday)...but it is suppose to snow again on Sunday. I hope I am not still stuck here for Christmas!
I have been watching TCM since I got here. It feels awesome. I don't have cable because I couldn't afford it anymore after I took a huge pay cut when I went from working for someone else to working for myself. I am much happier working on my own..but...I miss the extra 200 dollars a week I was making. Oh well so no cable for me right now, but, when I have it, all I do is sit and watch TCM. From Aug of 2005-Jan 2007, I had cable and I gained a massive amount of weight just sitting there and watching TCM. I swear as soon as I got rid of the cable, or rather it got shut off for non payment of bill, I instantly started the slow struggle of losing weight. I have lost almost 70 pounds since then but I swear sitting on the train for 4 days, I put a few back on and I hardly ate anything!!! Just a few bagels and some snacks. They forgot to stock the cafe car with veggie burgers so I did not have a hot meal for 4 days.
The hormones I am taking, if I don't get exercise, I will gain weight, even if I don't over eat. I get so much exercise in Seattle that being on the train for 4 days must of been a shock to my system. Everyday I walk up massive hills, ride my bike (weather permitting), work 2 hard labor jobs that give me A LOT of exercise and take power walks around Capitol Hill. If I had good knees I would probably start running again. When I get back to Washington State I am going to join 24 hour fitness, which is right by my apt and really start working out. I have to lose about 50 more pounds in order to get chest reconstruction surgery. If I don't, the surgery doesn't come out as good and I want a decent chest so I can walk around without a shirt on. I need to lose the 50 pounds regardless. It blows my mind that I weighed as much as I did.
This is definitely a white Christmas but also a hard holiday season for me because of the massive amount of pain I am carrying in my heart. Everyday is painful for me but being back east for the holidays just makes it worse. My sadness will be tenfold of what it is in Seattle. I feel like a fake. Pretending that everything is ok because everything is not ok. I want to run from the sun but all I find is cold darkness when I do. My heart is sorry for what its done. I don't want to live this life anymore but TCM, the books I am writing and my paintings are the only things that keep me from killing myself. It has been this way since 1994. These 3 things have saved me time and time again. Not having cable is hard sometimes because I cannot watch TCM. If they even knew the depth of why I love that channel, my tattoo would seem insignificant.
"I am going down...to the underground....to the underground...."
Peace be with you this holiday season.
Consume less and love more-
-
KPR
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
The train ride was stressful and cold. We arrived in Chicago 8 hours late and I had no lay over, which meant that I was on the train for 4 days without a break. I was pretty crabby by the time I got to Albany and the blizzard I walked into did not make it any better. Hell its 7 am the next morning and it is still snowing outside. I wonder if I will have to stay here again tonight (Saturday)...but it is suppose to snow again on Sunday. I hope I am not still stuck here for Christmas!
I have been watching TCM since I got here. It feels awesome. I don't have cable because I couldn't afford it anymore after I took a huge pay cut when I went from working for someone else to working for myself. I am much happier working on my own..but...I miss the extra 200 dollars a week I was making. Oh well so no cable for me right now, but, when I have it, all I do is sit and watch TCM. From Aug of 2005-Jan 2007, I had cable and I gained a massive amount of weight just sitting there and watching TCM. I swear as soon as I got rid of the cable, or rather it got shut off for non payment of bill, I instantly started the slow struggle of losing weight. I have lost almost 70 pounds since then but I swear sitting on the train for 4 days, I put a few back on and I hardly ate anything!!! Just a few bagels and some snacks. They forgot to stock the cafe car with veggie burgers so I did not have a hot meal for 4 days.
The hormones I am taking, if I don't get exercise, I will gain weight, even if I don't over eat. I get so much exercise in Seattle that being on the train for 4 days must of been a shock to my system. Everyday I walk up massive hills, ride my bike (weather permitting), work 2 hard labor jobs that give me A LOT of exercise and take power walks around Capitol Hill. If I had good knees I would probably start running again. When I get back to Washington State I am going to join 24 hour fitness, which is right by my apt and really start working out. I have to lose about 50 more pounds in order to get chest reconstruction surgery. If I don't, the surgery doesn't come out as good and I want a decent chest so I can walk around without a shirt on. I need to lose the 50 pounds regardless. It blows my mind that I weighed as much as I did.
This is definitely a white Christmas but also a hard holiday season for me because of the massive amount of pain I am carrying in my heart. Everyday is painful for me but being back east for the holidays just makes it worse. My sadness will be tenfold of what it is in Seattle. I feel like a fake. Pretending that everything is ok because everything is not ok. I want to run from the sun but all I find is cold darkness when I do. My heart is sorry for what its done. I don't want to live this life anymore but TCM, the books I am writing and my paintings are the only things that keep me from killing myself. It has been this way since 1994. These 3 things have saved me time and time again. Not having cable is hard sometimes because I cannot watch TCM. If they even knew the depth of why I love that channel, my tattoo would seem insignificant.
"I am going down...to the underground....to the underground...."
Peace be with you this holiday season.
Consume less and love more-
-
KPR
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
On the way...
I am on my way to NY on the train.
I will be offline for 3.5 days....there will be no new blog posts until then...
Merry Christmas.
-
KPR
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
I will be offline for 3.5 days....there will be no new blog posts until then...
Merry Christmas.
-
KPR
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
Monday, December 15, 2008
Train Ride to Nothing, Train Ride to Nowhere.
I am taking the Amtrak to NY on Tuesday afternoon. I will be on the train for 3.5 days with a break for 6-8 hours in Chicago, then its onto NY. It takes about 18 hours to get from Chicago to Albany NY. My Dad comes and picks me up there. I could take the train to NYC, but it is a lot longer trip, due to the routing of the train. It is much easier for my Dad to go to Albany than it is to go to Penn Station in NYC.
This will be the 5th time I have taken the train back east and back to visit my family. I spend my days on the train watching classic films on my laptop and portable DVD player, I also spend the time writing, reading and looking out the window dreaming of better days. It is a very long and interesting trip, sometimes its stressful, but all in all I like it better than an airplane.
I leave on Tuesday the 16th and arrive on Friday DEC 19th. I am leaving on Jan 6th and coming back on Jan 9th. It is always hard to come back to Seattle. All of my loved ones are back east in CT and NYC. I miss the east coast very much and I want to move back to NYC so bad. I just need the right opportunity, job and savings. I am sort of in a rush but I cannot rush myself without some help from an angel to help me.
I will be thinking of you my love as I saunter across the country, if only you were waiting for me with open arms, but alas, those arms are closed to me, but I still love you so much....we go very deep. Search yourself within my love and you will see...the person you love and need....is me.
I go back east with out an expectation in the world. I go expecting nothing, zero, zip...I do not expect to hear a word from you, my love. But if you find it in your heart, to see me while we are not so far apart, i would be forever grateful. All I need is one night, one time in each others sight, to hear any words at all from you,
would save my soul, make it easier to live each day, with any new memory we might make.
You have no idea how much I love you.
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
This will be the 5th time I have taken the train back east and back to visit my family. I spend my days on the train watching classic films on my laptop and portable DVD player, I also spend the time writing, reading and looking out the window dreaming of better days. It is a very long and interesting trip, sometimes its stressful, but all in all I like it better than an airplane.
I leave on Tuesday the 16th and arrive on Friday DEC 19th. I am leaving on Jan 6th and coming back on Jan 9th. It is always hard to come back to Seattle. All of my loved ones are back east in CT and NYC. I miss the east coast very much and I want to move back to NYC so bad. I just need the right opportunity, job and savings. I am sort of in a rush but I cannot rush myself without some help from an angel to help me.
I will be thinking of you my love as I saunter across the country, if only you were waiting for me with open arms, but alas, those arms are closed to me, but I still love you so much....we go very deep. Search yourself within my love and you will see...the person you love and need....is me.
I go back east with out an expectation in the world. I go expecting nothing, zero, zip...I do not expect to hear a word from you, my love. But if you find it in your heart, to see me while we are not so far apart, i would be forever grateful. All I need is one night, one time in each others sight, to hear any words at all from you,
would save my soul, make it easier to live each day, with any new memory we might make.
You have no idea how much I love you.
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Sugar in the Sacrament.
Sugar in the Sacrament.
by
Thursday off of the album "A City By the Light Divided."
What have you done?
You follow footsteps in the dark
and found your faith
left out behind your father's car.
You said, "there's no one watching over me or over you, it's always out of reach..."
I'm sinking still right into:
Oh my god where are you now?
Fractured lives dissolving
Like sugar in the sacrament
If it was just one night
Then we would be released
Tie these lies between our teeth
Keep tearing open bodies
'Let it bleed'
Tonight
Where have you gone?
Off with the friends you couldn't keep
Your mother's arms
Fill you up with all the empty needs
So the saints line up to bring her in,
Comfort her and it's always comforting
When they start to sing,
the same old:
'Holy holy, lift up your dress
Feel your body dissolving
Like sugar in the sacrament'
"If it was just one night
Then you could be redeemed
Tie these sins between your teeth,
Make hollow promises we'll never keep..... tonight."
This is all we've ever known of God.
Fly with me let me touch you now.
This is all we've ever known of God.
This is all we've ever known of God.
This is all we've ever known of God.
LISTEN TO THE SONG HERE:
(The second song is a band called Thrice....very much like Thursday, this is an older song by them but perhaps my favorite. If you listen to it (N), you will understand why like it pretty easily. But the first song. that song is for you. You would really like Thursday.)
-------------------------------------------
Thursday is such a good band. they are not a punk band. They are an emotional, independent band that hit it big with their sound. If you could take REM, SEAL and Pearl Jam...put them all together and you have Thursday. They are a NYC band and sing about New York City and the pain and suffering that goes along with living there and growing up too fast. They are amazing. best albums are:
A City By The Light Divided.
War All The Time.
Full Collapse.
I have been a fan of them since 2002. They are really pretty big now. This song I have reposted is one of their songs that means a lot to me. I wish you could hear it.
-
Michael and Kim
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
by
Thursday off of the album "A City By the Light Divided."
What have you done?
You follow footsteps in the dark
and found your faith
left out behind your father's car.
You said, "there's no one watching over me or over you, it's always out of reach..."
I'm sinking still right into:
Oh my god where are you now?
Fractured lives dissolving
Like sugar in the sacrament
If it was just one night
Then we would be released
Tie these lies between our teeth
Keep tearing open bodies
'Let it bleed'
Tonight
Where have you gone?
Off with the friends you couldn't keep
Your mother's arms
Fill you up with all the empty needs
So the saints line up to bring her in,
Comfort her and it's always comforting
When they start to sing,
the same old:
'Holy holy, lift up your dress
Feel your body dissolving
Like sugar in the sacrament'
"If it was just one night
Then you could be redeemed
Tie these sins between your teeth,
Make hollow promises we'll never keep..... tonight."
This is all we've ever known of God.
Fly with me let me touch you now.
This is all we've ever known of God.
This is all we've ever known of God.
This is all we've ever known of God.
LISTEN TO THE SONG HERE:
(The second song is a band called Thrice....very much like Thursday, this is an older song by them but perhaps my favorite. If you listen to it (N), you will understand why like it pretty easily. But the first song. that song is for you. You would really like Thursday.)
-------------------------------------------
Thursday is such a good band. they are not a punk band. They are an emotional, independent band that hit it big with their sound. If you could take REM, SEAL and Pearl Jam...put them all together and you have Thursday. They are a NYC band and sing about New York City and the pain and suffering that goes along with living there and growing up too fast. They are amazing. best albums are:
A City By The Light Divided.
War All The Time.
Full Collapse.
I have been a fan of them since 2002. They are really pretty big now. This song I have reposted is one of their songs that means a lot to me. I wish you could hear it.
-
Michael and Kim
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
My Leather Jacket

I have this amazing Leather Jacket that was given to me in 2001 by a member of this awesome punk band that was called Onward To Mayhem from Minneapolis. I had 3 other leather jackets stolen from me in my life so this one was my karma coming back to me. It is covered in spikes and studs and is an atypical street punk leather jacket. The kind that all the young punks want to make. I put a few patches on it and a few of the spikes, but most of it was done when I got it.
Well at the end of 2005 I started to gain a massive amount of weight due to a relationship I was in ending, inactivity, cable TV and depression. I probably gained 50 pounds or so over 2006. I have not been able to wear that jacket in a long time. In the beginning of 2005 I had lost weight really quickly when I entered into my last relationship. Before that from 2003-2004 I was also over-weight, but not as much as I was in 2006. I have not been able to wear this leather jacket since about 2004, except for a few months in 2005.
Last night my friend and her boyfriend came over to visit me for awhile. She is a punk rocker and I had told her about my jacket so I showed it to her. I put it on and low and behold....it fit! I was actually able to zip it up for the first time in years!!! Even with a hooded sweatshirt underneath it zipped up. It felt really good. I have lost almost 70 pounds since I taped the TCM piece in 2006. I feel really good and I look even better. Even though I am 36...I look about 21 and I am being serious about that. I do not look my age. I was told by a spiritual master that the reason that I look young and will always look way younger than my age is because in all my past lives I died as a young man. I never got to be that old. But this is the lifetime, if everything goes right, where I am going to live to be an old man. I guess we will see what happens.
I hardly ever wore this jacket, even when it fit, due to it being so heavy. But now since I am on testosterone and I am getting A LOT stronger, it all ready feels easier to wear. I am not an atypical street punk and never really was because I don't drink alcohol,I am not into violence and fucking shit up and I am not an elitist asshole like many of the other punks back east that wear these kinds of jackets. They actually think they are more punk than the people who don't have a spiked and studded leather jacket like that. When I got it in 2001 and started to wear it around NYC, CT and else where....these street punks were a lot nicer and friendlier to me than they were before I had this jacket. Totally silly. Totally dumb. Elitist punk rockers make me ill. I would rather be a loner than hang out with idiot assholes. As it is I never go to punk or hardcore shows anymore...I just buy records online and support the scene that way. I am not a scenester..I don't hang out with many other punk rockers. I have always been my own little original punk scene by myself and I like it that way. The only thing I want in this life is my best friend and wife. The one that lives in NYC, the one that I have loved for most of my life.
All I know right now is that I feel great about losing weight. I feel great that this jacket finally fits me. I feel great on the testosterone and I feel great when I think of my future.
Thanks for reading-
KPR
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
Friday, December 12, 2008
Weight Lost
I have now lost 70 pounds this past year.
...thank god....I look fucking awesome. I still have some to lose but as of now, I am comfortable with the size of my body.....
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
...thank god....I look fucking awesome. I still have some to lose but as of now, I am comfortable with the size of my body.....
"Wars May Come and Wars May Go But Art Is Forever."
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